Getting to know me

Did you know there's a journal tool on LDS.org? I'm assuming it's supposed to aid in scripture study but I'm using it for something else--a personal history journal! I haven't really kept a good journal since I met Justin 7 1/2 years ago so I feel like there are a lot of holes in my record keeping. This blog is definitely awesome but I write for you and I write to entertain--not as a record for my posterity.  So I've just began writing in my journal on LDS.org. I am writing a collection of stories, anecdotes if you will, that will portray what I was like, what my family was like, the tone and feel of my life. I'm not going in any order, just what I feel like writing that day. I try to get a story done in 30 minutes.  I was inspired after reading "These is My Words" by Nancy Turner. Some things will be spiritual, others hilarious, some hard-learned lessons. I don't want my posterity to try to piece my together from other sources. They'll know me because I'm telling them all about me. "What would they want to know and what do I want them to know" are my guiding questions for each entry. "How would I tell this story to my adult grandkid?" "What memories do I tell Justin as we sit together and talk about nothing?"

So here's one my stories, Diane Day, Job Finder

After years of underemployment, I felt when Justin would find an engineering job, it would feel like winning the lottery. Searching was exhausting and seemingly fruitless.  Justin registered with engineering jobsearch websites and most of the postings were in California or back East and it felt like his resume went into the far-reaches of the internet abyss, never to be heard from again. Then Justin found a job listing with a firm in Heber shortly after graduating April of 2012. A friend from high school currently worked for the company so Justin felt he had an in. Justin wanted to do this right so he asked this friend to submit his resume for him. We decided to wait until after the weekend, use that time to fast and pray and then send the resume Monday morning either on our own or through this friend.  I sent an email to my family asking for prayers, fasting, positive thoughts--anything that might help Justin get this job. Unfortunately we never heard back from this friend. Monday morning, after our day of fasting, I discovered that the job posting had been pulled. We hadn't applied.

After I got off the phone telling Justin what I'd discovered, I was very tempted to be angry with Justin for waiting so long. He should have just applied! Waiting to do it the perfect way took us out of the running.  Then I felt a very strong impression not to get angry. Don't get mad, stay calm, you need to listen. All I could feel was my disappointment. Justin had sent his resume to dozens of jobs across the country but we both wanted to stay in Utah. Then a very simple idea came to me: Make a list of Utah engineering firms. Thus began my search.

Google became my friend.  I found lists of engineering firms of all kinds and compiled them into my master spreadsheet. I ruled out any company not civil-related. Then I searched each firm individually hoping to find a company website. Once on the site, I looked for job listings or a contact for employment opportunities or just an email address. Without Justin's knowledge, I inquired with these companies via email if they had any positions. Cold-emailing, I call it.  I made up a name, Diane Day, just in case what I was doing was completely unprofessional. I didn't want it to reflect on Justin.  I got a response within an hour but the email was a gmail account.  What company was this Brandon Anderson from? He said to send in a resume but I can't reply back, "What company are you again?"  Oh, what have I done?  I called Justin and told him not to get mad at me but I've been searching for jobs under a pseudonym on your behalf and this guy wants your resume but I don't know what company he is from. Justin laughed because I was being ridiculous and he can't get mad at finding a job lead.  After tracing my steps and comparing emails to other companies, I deduced it was Brandon Anderson from Anderson Engineering (that's what I would have guessed anyway). Justin applied, they called for an interview.  A couple of weeks later, they called for a second interview and then while we were in St. George in June, they called and offered him the job! He later found out he beat over 100 applicants!

I think back and wonder if fasting for that Heber job was a waste of time. It wasn't. Fasting showed the Lord that I was serious about wanting his help. But more importantly, it put me in a humble place where I could listen, really listen to what He was trying to tell me. Falling into anger and bitterness would have made me deaf to the instruction I was wanting to hear. How many times is God trying to tell me something but I've shut him out with my pride and anger? I wonder what other things I am capable of, what other things I will be led to if I strive more to get on that spiritual place where I can truly listen.

Other stories on my to-write list: When my babies were born of course, When I Almost Got Hit By a Pheasant in my Living Room and other Bird Close-Calls, Snow College: Land of Fun and Not Studying, Why it Took Me Clear to My Senior Year in HS to Learn That Not Missing School Actually Made School Easy and Fun, River Heights, Utah: The Land of My Innocent Childhood Except for the Time Kenny Fox Tried to Strangle Me for Throwing His Blankie Down a Window Well and When I Got Caught Lighting Matches Behind the Neighbor's Front Porch, The Most Mad I Got At a Walmart Employee, I May Be the Only Person Who Swore When They Got Their BYU Acceptance Letter, Why I Can't Eat Panda Express, and Moms Do Play Cars Despite What Hotwheels Execs Think.